Tag Archives: auralee wallace

Boobsie’s Revenge? Skinny Dipping With Murder by Auralee Wallace

Home life is no more natural to us than a cage is natural to a cockatoo. – George Bernard Shaw

If you have followed this blog for any length of time you will know that despite my admittedly crusty exterior I am a huge sucker for love stories, with a lot of heat. However, my all time favourite author does not pen erotica or anything remotely similar she writes contemporary humorous fiction and her latest release is a cozy mystery series. One would think it far out of my wheel house, to date there has not been a throbbing member in sight unless one of her characters has been unfortunate enough to whack their thumb with a hammer. She makes up for this with incredible, truly awe inspiring characterization and the wackiest plot lines ever!

In my personal reading world her characters are my closest friends, practically family, and this is coming from someone who snorts at the term “book boyfriend“. I should probably take this opportunity to introduce you to the Erica Bloom I know and love. You might know her by the unfortunate moniker of “Boobsie Bloom”, you have to admit it is rather catchy and if you knew what happened at The Raspberry Social you would understand. Is it reason to avoid coming home? Not really. But I have been known to avoid my Grandmother for months at a time because I know I am going to hear about my weight!


SDWM

57d93-goodreads

SYNOPSIS – When Erica was a teenager, she fell prey to a practical joke that left her near-naked in Otter Lake’s annual Raspberry Social. The incident was humiliating, but it wasn’t like anyone got killed-until now. Those who were behind that long-ago prank are starting to turn up dead, and Erica’s appearance in town makes her a prime suspect. To make matters worse, the town sheriff just happens to be Erica’s old nemesis, Grady Forrester…who also happens to be hotter than ever. Can Erica find a way to dig up the truth-before someone digs her grave?


Otter Lake is a small town like no other, yet one that every reader knows and loves. With her mother’s business struggling Erica is forced to return to the scene of the crime only to literally trip over a  body. This in and of itself would be upsetting but not particularly catastrophic unless they (the corpse) were tied to that prank that drove her away in the first place.

With her bestie at her side, determined to solve the crime and avoid a trip to the big house in the process, the reader is treated to a literary adventure like no other but one that will have you wiping tears of mirth from your eyes and wishing you knew people the likes of Freddie, Summer, Grady, Rhonda, Kit Kat and Tweety.

Regardless of whether reading about heaving bosoms has become stale, trust me when I say read Skinny Dipping With Murder now. You won’t regret it. The only issue you may encounter is the interminable wait until August when Pumpkin Picking With Murder comes out.

BUY LINKS

Amazon | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Kobo | Chapters/Indigo | B&N 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

AWAuralee Wallace has played many roles in her life, including college professor, balloon seller, and collections agent. When this semi-natural blond mother of three children (and psychiatric nurse to two rescue cats) isn’t writing humorous novels about quirky characters, she can often be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard. She can also be found on Twitter, Goodreads, Facebook, and her blog http://auraleewallace.com/.

Auralee is represented by Natalie Lakosil, Bradford Literary Agency.

 

 

 

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Awakening From a Devastating Reading Slump – GUEST POST

GUEST POST – teachergirl73


 After reading Andrea’s humorous post “Auld Lang Syne”, I began to consider my own lack of motivation to pick up a book. I’ve been in a serious reading slump lately, whether it was the hustle and bustle of the holidays, or a bit of the winter blahs, or just simply a bit of “brain freeze” to quote one of my Grade 2 students who was trying to tell me that he had been “thinking” way too hard. While trying to contain my snort of agreement as best as I could, I just empathized with him and assured him that all we needed was the holiday to reboot so to speak. Upon reflection, I think that my reading slump might actually be attributed in part to the demise of a serious literary relationship spanning some fourteen years now.

WMOBI have made many attempts over the past few months to dive into Diana Gabaldon’s latest endeavour Written In My Own Heart’s Blood, the eighth book in the Outlander series, all without success and I finally gave up around mid-December. Even though I consider myself to be a true Outlander fan, for the last three books the only reason why I have continued with the series is because I am held captive, reading in horrified fascination unable to believe what has been done to the story and characters. I feel almost disloyal writing this, not to the author, but to the series itself. The story should have ended after the third book, Voyager, but by then there was a voracious audience awaiting each new installment, which no doubt impacted the arc of the story line. To clarify, I too was one of those people, waiting desperately for the next book in the series. As each new book was published, I kept waiting for that illusive reading “high” that I felt in the beginning but as with most addictions, it never quite happened. Even after the complete waste of time that was The Fiery Cross (hours, days and weeks of my life that I will never get back!) there was still a part of me hoping that one day the magic would return.

caitriona-balfe-outlander-01-350x164

However all is not lost, thanks to visually stunning, and superior script writing that comes with “Outlander, the television series. As it appears the show is going to stretch each book out having only adapted a small part in the first eight episodes. I feel confident that I will get to enjoy all my favourite parts of the story as told through Ronald D. Moore’s unique yet faithful interpretation of the novels. I’m eagerly awaiting the mid-season return of the STARZ production of Season One Outlander” on April 4, 2015, along with millions of other women. I ask you this, is there anyone doesn’t want to see more of Sam Heughan?


Following the holidays, I realized that that the worst was over and I had finally seemed to be coming out the other side of my slump. I would like to say thank Auralee Wallace, who let me beta read an early version of her latest book, Skinny Dipping With Murder, that will be coming out in early 2016. It’s about a small-town girl who reluctantly returns home after years away and promptly becomes embroiled in hilarity, hi-jinks and a little dab of murder. I am looking forward to the finished product and for more stories involving Erica and her trusty side-kick Freddie!

When We Wake US cover

DESCRIPTION – My name is Tegan Oglietti, and on the last day of my first lifetime, I was so, so happy.

Sixteen-year-old Tegan is just like every other girl living in 2027–she’s happiest when playing the guitar, she’s falling in love for the first time, and she’s joining her friends to protest the wrongs of the world: environmental collapse, social discrimination, and political injustice.

But on what should have been the best day of Tegan’s life, she dies–and wakes up a hundred years in the future, locked in a government facility with no idea what happened.

Tegan is the first government guinea pig to be cryonically frozen and successfully revived, which makes her an instant celebrity–even though all she wants to do is try to rebuild some semblance of a normal life. But the future isn’t all she hoped it would be, and when appalling secrets come to light, Tegan must make a choice: Does she keep her ead down and survive, or fight for a better future?

Image and description from: http://www.karenhealey.com/books/when-we-wake/


I have just begun reading When We Wake by Karen Healey. It is a dystopian novel that examines many different themes including global warming, famine, civil unrest and overpopulation in the not-too-distant future. What is most intriguing is the possibility of what could happen if science fiction meets reality and we are able to pause a human life through the use of cryonic freezing, only to restart that life many years later. There are many ethical questions that come up early in the story around the consequences of bringing someone back to life. What are the political and legal ramifications of reviving someone who has been long dead? Are they still consider citizens under the law or the property of the institutions who have brought them back to life? How do you re-integrate someone into society who has been officially dead for a century? Who gets to decide who is revived and who isn’t? And would you want to be given a second chance at life if everyone you knew and loved was long dead and buried? I’m really looking forward to seeing how the story of Tegan unravels as she faces a brand new world in When We Wake.

RELATED ARTICLES

Punishment – Linden MacIntyre GUEST POST REVIEW

GUEST POST – Auralee Wallace

Punishment

Punishment

Linden MacIntyre 

In Punishment, his first novel since completing his Long Stretch trilogy, Scotiabank Giller-winner Linden MacIntyre brings us a powerful exploration of justice and vengeance, and the peril that ensues when passion replaces reason, in a small town shaken by a tragic death.

Forced to retire early from his job as a corrections officer in Kingston Penitentiary, Tony Breau has limped back to the village where he grew up to lick his wounds, only to find that Dwayne Strickland, a young con he’d had dealings with in prison is back there too–and once again in trouble. Strickland has just been arrested following the suspicious death of a teenage girl, the granddaughter of Caddy Stewart, Tony’s first love.
Tony is soon caught in a fierce emotional struggle between the outcast Strickland and the still alluring Caddy. And then another figure from Tony’s past, the forceful Neil Archie MacDonald–just retired in murky circumstances from the Boston police force–stokes the community’s anger and suspicion and an irresistible demand for punishment. As Tony struggles to resist the vortex of vigilante action, Punishment builds into a total page-turner that blindsides you with twists and betrayals.

REVIEW

Ah, November. I could not pick a better release date month for Linden MacIntyre’s Punishment.

That doesn’t sound very good, does it?  Yet, in my biased opinion (redundancy intentional), Punishment is a good book.

Let me begin by saying, I am not the best person to review Punishment. I have a long-held bias towards Canadian Literature. It probably started back in university when I signed up for a Can. Lit. class. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but the first short story assigned was entitled “Snow,” and from there we ventured into tales of incest, disease, rape, and more general winter suffering. This is not to say these works didn’t have merit, on the contrary, they were assigned university readings, therefore someone with a PhD already had vetted them as “good,” or at the very least “important” and I was deeply affected by their powerful deliverance of messages of…of what? Cold, horror and dismay? I’m only half joking here, but the point is, I wouldn’t argue their literary merits, I just felt like I needed to be treated for depression afterwards.

Now, I’m not claiming to be an expert on Canadian Literature as I took only the one course, and I’m sure there are many shiny, happy examples of Canadian books out there that wouldn’t leave me feeling like I had been emotionally carved out. I just haven’t found them.

Fast-forwarding to present times, when I picked up MacIntyre’s book, I thought maybe I was ready to dip a toe once again into frigid Canadian waters. After all, it had been at least a year since I had read any other Canadiana, and it has been a relatively warm and sunny fall.

I still can’t decide if it was a good idea or not.

From a more clinical point of view (I’m not going to pretend to strive for objectivity), the book’s story questions were compelling. I read it quickly. I was invested in what was happening. I found the themes of justice and punishment intellectually satisfying, and I admired the weaving of the characters’ struggles against the aftermath of 911. As for the publisher’s promise of a “total page-turner that blindsides you with twists and betrayals,” well, the problem with such a claim is that I found myself looking for all the twists. As a result, I wasn’t so much blindsided at the turn of the page, as I was turning the page to be validated in my suspicions – a nonetheless satisfying experience (let’s be honest, sometimes even more satisfying). So yes, for me, Punishment, meets most, if not all, of my criteria for a really good, maybe even an excellent, book. More to the point, perhaps it will meet yours. I will say, however, that I’m going to wait at least a year again before I delve back into any Canadian literature…maybe even longer. I’ll re-evaluate in the spring.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Linden_MacIntyreLinden MacIntyre is the co-host of the fifth estate and the winner of nine Gemini Awards for broadcast journalism. His most recent book, a boyhood memoir called Causeway: A Passage from Innocence won both the Edna Staebler Award for Creative Non-Fiction and the Evelyn Richardson Prize for Non-Fiction.


RELATED ARTICLES

ABOUT Auralee

photo (1)Auralee Wallace is an author of humorous commercial women’s fiction and occasional guest blogger at Penny Dreadful Book Reviews https://pennydreadfulbooks.me/. She is a member of the RWA, and her debut novel, Sidekick, a superhero urban fantasy, placed as a finalist in the Virginia Fool for Love Contest, The TARA Contest and The Catherine. Sidekick has been picked up by Harlequin’s Escape Publishing and is due for release June 1st, 2014. Auralee has an undergraduate degree in psychology, a Master’s degree in English literature and has worked in the publishing industry for a number of years before teaching at the college level.

Auralee has always been fascinated by the power of stereotypes in terms of race, gender, and disability and how those beliefs colour our understanding of the world and of each other.

When this semi-natural blonde mother of three children and two rescue cats isn’t writing or playing soccer, she can be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard. She can also be found on Twitter, Goodreads, Facebook, and her blog http://auraleewallace.com.

 

NEED YOUR HELP! VOTE FOR SIDEKICK!

GUEST POST – Auralee Wallace

Thank you Addicted 2 Heroines for nominating SIDEKICK’s Cover! Escape Publishing’s cover artists do know their stuff.

Sidekick

http://www.addicted2heroines.com/2014/12/hottest-heroine-covers-round-4-giveaway.html

I’ve got some pretty stiff competition. Check them out!

addicted2heroinesheader_5

THE SIDEKICK RETURNS – Book Two

GUEST POST – by Auralee Wallace

I’ve had a number of readers express confusion about whether SIDEKICK is a stand-alone book or a series. First let me say, I am so sorry! Kind of. I know SIDEKICK ends with some questions unanswered, and I also know that was a horrible thing for me to do. I think I need to go into a little bit of the history to explain how SIDEKICK came into being in order to clarify why I did this.

To begin, I always intended SIDEKICK to be a series. I love series, and when I came up with the idea for SIDEKICK, I was so excited about all the different directions I could take the character Bremy St. James. After I finished writing the first book, however, the cold, brutal realities of the publishing world set in. At first, SIDEKICK’s future looked bright. I had a number of nibbles from agents, but they all can back with the same verdict – it’s funny, it’s smart, but it may be just too out there to be an easy sell. After all, the urban fantasy world is pretty well saturated, and most of the genre focuses on the moody and broody. Well, Bremy St. James is a lot of things, but moody and broody she is not. That was a purposeful intention on my part, though. I wanted to depict a young woman who was resilient, who didn’t break into a million pieces by every hardship that came her way, whose everything wasn’t wrapped up in a man… someone heroic, even if at times her heroism is slightly delusional.

Anyway, at this point, a friend of mine recommended I pitch directly to editors. That’s when things really started to happen. All of the sudden, I had a bunch of offers! Good times. I finally settled on Escape Publishing because, to use a modern cliche, they really seemed to be picking up what I was putting down. The thing with my ebook contract though is that I didn’t get a multi-book deal with a schedule. Don’t get me wrong Escape has been extremely encouraging about sequels, but it’s just not guaranteed.

So where does SIDEKICK 2 stand? Well, I hope to have it completely done by the end of October. Let me say, I have had so much fun with the sequel. My poor Bremy who never lets anything get to her is about to be truly tested to her emotional core; Jenny, her mysterious twin, is about to step into the light; and, of course, everybody’s romantic relationship will be shaken…Oh! And, of course, there will be more Dark Ryder. Once it’s done, I will have to submit to Escape to see what they think. I am thoroughly optimistic that they will be pleased (SIDEKICK, I think, has had a good debut, so that helps). At that point, I should have a release date, a cover reveal, and all that fun stuff.

So in the meantime, if you’re hoping for a sequel, write a review or give SIDEKICK a rating if you haven’t already (Goodreads, Amazon, KOBO, B&N, whatever!), recommend it to a friend, or just keep your fingers crossed.

Thank you to everyone who has expressed interest, and, once again, I apologize for the confusion!

Auralee

ABOUT Auralee

photo (1)Auralee Wallace is an author of humorous commercial women’s fiction and occasional guest blogger at Penny Dreadful Book Reviews https://pennydreadfulbooks.me/. She is a member of the RWA, and her debut novel, Sidekick, a superhero urban fantasy, placed as a finalist in the Virginia Fool for Love Contest, The TARA Contest and The Catherine. Sidekick has been picked up by Harlequin’s Escape Publishing and is due for release June 1st, 2014. Auralee has an undergraduate degree in psychology, a Master’s degree in English literature and has worked in the publishing industry for a number of years before teaching at the college level.

Auralee has always been fascinated by the power of stereotypes in terms of race, gender, and disability and how those beliefs colour our understanding of the world and of each other.

When this semi-natural blonde mother of three children and three rescue cats isn’t writing or playing soccer, she can be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard. She can also be found on Twitter, Goodreads, Facebook, and her blog http://auraleewallace.com.

ABOUT SIDEKICK

SidekickHeroes meets Bridget Jones in this brilliant, hilarious debut novel about a girl who just wants to save the world…

Bremy St James, daughter of billionaire Atticus St James, has been cut off from the family fortune and is struggling to survive in a world that no longer holds its breath every time she buys a new outfit. To make matters worse, her twin sister is keeping secrets, loan sharks are circling, and the man of her dreams — a newspaper reporter — is on assignment to bring down everyone with the last name St James.

Things are certainly looking bleak for the down-and-out socialite until a good deed throws her into the path of the city’s top crime-fighter, Dark Ryder. Suddenly, Bremy has a new goal: apprentice to a superhero, and start her own crime-fighting career.

Ryder has no need for a sidekick, but it turns out the city needs Bremy’s help. Atticus St James is planning the crime of the century, and Bremy may be the only one able to get close enough to her father to stop him.

Now all she needs to do is figure out this superhero thing in less than a month, keep her identity secret from the man who could very well be The One, and save the city from total annihilation.

Well, no one ever said being a superhero would be easy

 BUY LINKS

AMAZON UK | AMAZON CA | AMAZON US | AMAZON AU | B&N | KOBO

If I Were in Claire’s Shoes: An Exploration of Alternative Reactions to Being Sent Back in Time or “Dude, Where’s My Car?”

GUEST POST – Dude, Where’s My Car? by Auralee Wallace

Disclaimer: This post in no way is intended to insult Outlander. I understand the power of Outlander. I bow to all that is Outlander. Please don’t hurt me.

outlander0807141280jpg-0d271d_1280w

So I finally watched the first episode of Outlander the other day, and my reactions were many and varied (actually not so varied). First, the filming was beautiful (Why oh why can’t I see it in HD in Canada? Boo). Second, the costumes, settings, props, they, too, were beautiful (my husband even got sucked in for a minute or two based on his admiration of the cut Frank’s jacket.) Third, Jamie is BEAUTIFUL. Let’s pause for a brief Jamie moment, shall we?

Boom!

Oh my. Yes, that’s better.

I did, however, have one little hiccup in my generally glowing reactions. Claire. I have difficulty relating to Claire. I just don’t get the way she thinks sometimes. It got me thinking, how would I react if I were suddenly sent back in time? Would Claire’s strategies really help her survive? Would mine? I just couldn’t figure out the answer. But maybe you can…

Below I will present the evidence. Then after I ask you:

Who is Woman Enough to Survive 18th Century Scotland?…or …Who Will Get Booted Off the Horse?

off the horse

EXHIBIT A

THE SITUATION: you just woken up after being sent back in time…

CLAIRE:

time travel

Claire: What?

Her lovely figure dressed in flowing white gown wanders over lovely hill and dale.

BANG! Gunshot rings out.

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: When confronted with the impossible, the rational mind will grope for the logical. Perhaps I had stumbled onto the set of a cinema company filming a costume drama of some sort. But there was no logical reason for actors to fire live ammunition.

Runs.


AURALEE:

Beeker

Auralee: What the…? Did I pass out? Think, Auralee think. Did you mix allergy medication with wine last night? No…no…I swore I would never do that again. Where’s my car? Don’t tell me I forgot where I parked again. I hate it when I do that. God, every freaking time! You think I could study a landmark, remember a freaking tree or something.

Her figure, dressed in soccer shorts, t-shirt and running shoes, stomps angrily over lovely hill and dale.

BANG! Gunshot rings out.

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: What the f*#@ was that!

Runs…faster. Running shoes, remember?

Commentary: I think I totally nailed that one, don’t you?

EXHIBIT B

THE SITUATION: You’ve been taken back to what seems little more than a hut to a group of rough looking highlanders. They’re joking about assaulting you. Yeah, not funny. One of them, a rather fine looking lad, is injured and sitting by the fire. His arm is obviously dislocated. You know how to fix it.

CLAIRE:

Jamie

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: The wisest course of action would have been to keep my head down, my mouth shut, and wait for the search parties Frank must have called out by now.

Big man moves to pop handsome and also big man’s shoulder back in wrong way.

Claire: Don’t you dare! Stand aside at once. You’ll break his arm if you do it like that.


AURALEE:

Burn the witch

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: They think I’m witch. Stupid soccer shorts and running shoes. They totally think I’m a witch. I’m just going to keep my head down, and my mouth shut.

Big man moves to pop handsome and also big man’s shoulder back in wrong way.

Auralee: Oh! Pardon me. Pardon! Yes, if I a lowly witch woman, sorry, I mean, just woman, could have a word? I think perhaps I could show you how to do that perhaps without breaking his arm…then maybe you could consider not killing me?

Commentary: I’ll admit, I’m not quite sure which is the best approach here. I don’t like to consider myself snivelling, but I not at all am convinced that Claire’s feisty approach would go over too well…at least not long term. I typed into Google “treatment of women in 18th century Scotland”. Let’s just say I didn’t find anything really great.

EXHIBIT C

THE SITUATION: You’re on a horse with hot highlander. You’re freezing. It’s raining.

CLAIRE:

plaid
Claire: Careful. What are you trying to do?

Jamie: I’ll get my plaid loose to cover ye. You’re shivering.

Claire: Thank you. But I’m fine, really.

Jamie: You’re shaking so hard, it’s making my teeth rattle.


AURALEE:

Auralee: Um…what’s going on back there?

Jamie: I’ll get my plaid loose to cover ye. You’re shivering.

Auralee: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Oh God, thank you. So, what do you have on underneath that plaid? (Just kidding. I wouldn’t ask that last part. But I’d totally be thinking it.)

Commentary: Feisty be damned. I hate being cold. I always feel like Jack Nicholson when I’m cold.

So cold

EXHIBIT D

THE SITUATION: You’ve been riding forever now. You’ve almost been killed. It’s cold and freezing. Jamie offers you some alcohol.

CLAIRE:

Jamie: Have a wee nip. It willna fill your belly…

Claire angrily yanks head away.

…but it will make you forget you’re hungry.”

Claire deigns to drink.


AURALEE:

drinking

Commentary: Not necessary…I’m mean, seriously.

Well, there you have it. I’ve presented all the evidence. Who do you think would survive being sent back to 18th Century Scotland? I’m dying to know your thoughts, but until that time, I’ll just tide myself over with more Jamie. Ah, Jamie…

 

ABOUT Auralee

photo (1)Auralee Wallace is an author of humorous commercial women’s fiction and occasional guest blogger at Penny Dreadful Book Reviews https://pennydreadfulbooks.me/. She is a member of the RWA, and her debut novel, Sidekick, a superhero urban fantasy, placed as a finalist in the Virginia Fool for Love Contest, The TARA Contest and The Catherine. Sidekick has been picked up by Harlequin’s Escape Publishing and is due for release June 1st, 2014. Auralee has an undergraduate degree in psychology, a Master’s degree in English literature and has worked in the publishing industry for a number of years before teaching at the college level.

Auralee has always been fascinated by the power of stereotypes in terms of race, gender, and disability and how those beliefs colour our understanding of the world and of each other.

When this semi-natural blonde mother of three children and three rescue cats isn’t writing or playing soccer, she can be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard. She can also be found on Twitter, Goodreads, Facebook, and her blog http://auraleewallace.com.

ABOUT SIDEKICK

SidekickHeroes meets Bridget Jones in this brilliant, hilarious debut novel about a girl who just wants to save the world…

Bremy St James, daughter of billionaire Atticus St James, has been cut off from the family fortune and is struggling to survive in a world that no longer holds its breath every time she buys a new outfit. To make matters worse, her twin sister is keeping secrets, loan sharks are circling, and the man of her dreams — a newspaper reporter — is on assignment to bring down everyone with the last name St James.

Things are certainly looking bleak for the down-and-out socialite until a good deed throws her into the path of the city’s top crime-fighter, Dark Ryder. Suddenly, Bremy has a new goal: apprentice to a superhero, and start her own crime-fighting career.

Ryder has no need for a sidekick, but it turns out the city needs Bremy’s help. Atticus St James is planning the crime of the century, and Bremy may be the only one able to get close enough to her father to stop him.

Now all she needs to do is figure out this superhero thing in less than a month, keep her identity secret from the man who could very well be The One, and save the city from total annihilation.

Well, no one ever said being a superhero would be easy

 BUY LINKS

AMAZON UK | AMAZON CA | AMAZON US | AMAZON AU | B&N | KOBO

Chewbacca: Perfect Sidekick or Perfect Date?

GUEST POST – I Want Me Some Wookie by Auralee Wallace

Back in June when my debut novel, SIDEKICK, was set to launch, I was tasked with the job of writing a number of guest posts. I decided, in order to stick with the whole sidekick theme, I’d spend some time looking into some historical examples. That’s when I stumbled across Chewie.

Initially, I thought I would do a Top Ten list for why Chewbacca may be the best sidekick at all time, but it wasn’t long before I discovered Chewie was so much more than a sidekick; he was a compelling male… what is he again? Oh yeah, a Wookie. But fearing the blowback of Wookie love, I never published the post. I thought I had gone too far even for me.

Well, the months have passed, and it seems the “Wookie” just won’t die. I wanted it die. When I re-looked at this post and thought, “Huh, that’s the most inane things you’ve ever written,” but for Penny of Penny Dreadful Reviews it has become a bit of a thing. So at Penny’s request, here it is. Much like the Wookie upsetting her is not a good idea.

upset

DISCLAIMER: I still have grave reservations about attaching my name to this piece. In fact, I will probably deny ownership of it should it ever come up in polite conversation, but, regardless, here it is.

Let The Trial Begin!

RULES: Points will be awarded to either the Sidekick or Date category in a completely whimsical, entirely biased fashion.

1. Chewy has a fabulous head of hair. I can’t really see many sidekick advantages here, but from a dating perspective, it’s unlikely that he’ll ever go bald…although I do have to wonder about the shedding issue. Once you get wet dog smell in your upholstery, it’s never coming out. No points to either side.

hair

2. Everybody wants to imitate the wookie. In fact, at times I tend to think those wookie noises might even upstage the imitable Hans Solo. Not good in a sidekick. Great for a family dinner though. Your family will love him! Everyone will be making Chewie sounds around the table. And those are happy sounds. Try it. I know you’ll like it. One point date!

3. He knows how to dance. Again, no readily obvious sidekick advantages here, but just imagine what a magical evening it would be to dance cheek to furry cheek with our friend Chewie. One point date!

dancing

4. He doesn’t talk in a language anyone can understand except for Hans Solo…and I guess other Wookies. So this is a handy trait for a sidekick. Think of all the secret information he could pass on. Plus, he can’t talk smack about his boy, Hans. Then again, I can also think of many a first date where I wished my companion was unable to speak. I know you can too. Two points Sidekick. One point Date.

27874_funny_chewbacca_quote

5. He’s warm. When you’re not saving the universe, how awesome would it be to curl up with Chewy on the couch? You know he’s even more comfortable than one of those blankets you see on TV with the sleeves. That being said if you were freezing to death on the ice plains of say planet Hoth he might also be fun to snuggle with. One point each!

hanchew1

6. He’s caring and would take care of you when you’re sick. I’m going to give one point to Sidekick here, but two points to date because that there is husband material.

hs1

hs

7. He’s big and has some impressive muscle. Very useful in a sidekick. Very attractive in a date (I am so tempted to expand on the “big” part right now, but I won’t. I’m starting to creep myself out!) One point each!

Well, I thought about going to ten, but I just can’t…not after seeing that look on Leia’s face. So let’s tally the scores!

leia

 FINAL SCORE

Date: SEVEN              Sidekick: FOUR

I know. I’m kind of surprised too. But there you have it. I hope you enjoyed this exploration of the Wookie, but let us never speak of it again.

 ABOUT Auralee

photo (1)Auralee Wallace is an author of humorous commercial women’s fiction and occasional guest blogger at Penny Dreadful Book Reviews https://pennydreadfulbooks.me/. She is a member of the RWA, and her debut novel, Sidekick, a superhero urban fantasy, placed as a finalist in the Virginia Fool for Love Contest, The TARA Contest and The Catherine. Sidekick has been picked up by Harlequin’s Escape Publishing and is due for release June 1st, 2014. Auralee has an undergraduate degree in psychology, a Master’s degree in English literature and has worked in the publishing industry for a number of years before teaching at the college level.

Auralee has always been fascinated by the power of stereotypes in terms of race, gender, and disability and how those beliefs colour our understanding of the world and of each other.

When this semi-natural blonde mother of three children and three rescue cats isn’t writing or playing soccer, she can be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard. She can also be found on Twitter, Goodreads, Facebook, and her blog http://auraleewallace.com.

ABOUT SIDEKICK

SidekickHeroes meets Bridget Jones in this brilliant, hilarious debut novel about a girl who just wants to save the world…

Bremy St James, daughter of billionaire Atticus St James, has been cut off from the family fortune and is struggling to survive in a world that no longer holds its breath every time she buys a new outfit. To make matters worse, her twin sister is keeping secrets, loan sharks are circling, and the man of her dreams — a newspaper reporter — is on assignment to bring down everyone with the last name St James.

Things are certainly looking bleak for the down-and-out socialite until a good deed throws her into the path of the city’s top crime-fighter, Dark Ryder. Suddenly, Bremy has a new goal: apprentice to a superhero, and start her own crime-fighting career.

Ryder has no need for a sidekick, but it turns out the city needs Bremy’s help. Atticus St James is planning the crime of the century, and Bremy may be the only one able to get close enough to her father to stop him.

Now all she needs to do is figure out this superhero thing in less than a month, keep her identity secret from the man who could very well be The One, and save the city from total annihilation.

Well, no one ever said being a superhero would be easy

 BUY LINKS

AMAZON UK | AMAZON CA | AMAZON US | AMAZON AU | B&N | KOBO