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If I Were in Claire’s Shoes: An Exploration of Alternative Reactions to Being Sent Back in Time or “Dude, Where’s My Car?”

GUEST POST – Dude, Where’s My Car? by Auralee Wallace

Disclaimer: This post in no way is intended to insult Outlander. I understand the power of Outlander. I bow to all that is Outlander. Please don’t hurt me.

outlander0807141280jpg-0d271d_1280w

So I finally watched the first episode of Outlander the other day, and my reactions were many and varied (actually not so varied). First, the filming was beautiful (Why oh why can’t I see it in HD in Canada? Boo). Second, the costumes, settings, props, they, too, were beautiful (my husband even got sucked in for a minute or two based on his admiration of the cut Frank’s jacket.) Third, Jamie is BEAUTIFUL. Let’s pause for a brief Jamie moment, shall we?

Boom!

Oh my. Yes, that’s better.

I did, however, have one little hiccup in my generally glowing reactions. Claire. I have difficulty relating to Claire. I just don’t get the way she thinks sometimes. It got me thinking, how would I react if I were suddenly sent back in time? Would Claire’s strategies really help her survive? Would mine? I just couldn’t figure out the answer. But maybe you can…

Below I will present the evidence. Then after I ask you:

Who is Woman Enough to Survive 18th Century Scotland?…or …Who Will Get Booted Off the Horse?

off the horse

EXHIBIT A

THE SITUATION: you just woken up after being sent back in time…

CLAIRE:

time travel

Claire: What?

Her lovely figure dressed in flowing white gown wanders over lovely hill and dale.

BANG! Gunshot rings out.

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: When confronted with the impossible, the rational mind will grope for the logical. Perhaps I had stumbled onto the set of a cinema company filming a costume drama of some sort. But there was no logical reason for actors to fire live ammunition.

Runs.


AURALEE:

Beeker

Auralee: What the…? Did I pass out? Think, Auralee think. Did you mix allergy medication with wine last night? No…no…I swore I would never do that again. Where’s my car? Don’t tell me I forgot where I parked again. I hate it when I do that. God, every freaking time! You think I could study a landmark, remember a freaking tree or something.

Her figure, dressed in soccer shorts, t-shirt and running shoes, stomps angrily over lovely hill and dale.

BANG! Gunshot rings out.

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: What the f*#@ was that!

Runs…faster. Running shoes, remember?

Commentary: I think I totally nailed that one, don’t you?

EXHIBIT B

THE SITUATION: You’ve been taken back to what seems little more than a hut to a group of rough looking highlanders. They’re joking about assaulting you. Yeah, not funny. One of them, a rather fine looking lad, is injured and sitting by the fire. His arm is obviously dislocated. You know how to fix it.

CLAIRE:

Jamie

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: The wisest course of action would have been to keep my head down, my mouth shut, and wait for the search parties Frank must have called out by now.

Big man moves to pop handsome and also big man’s shoulder back in wrong way.

Claire: Don’t you dare! Stand aside at once. You’ll break his arm if you do it like that.


AURALEE:

Burn the witch

INTERNAL DIALOGUE: They think I’m witch. Stupid soccer shorts and running shoes. They totally think I’m a witch. I’m just going to keep my head down, and my mouth shut.

Big man moves to pop handsome and also big man’s shoulder back in wrong way.

Auralee: Oh! Pardon me. Pardon! Yes, if I a lowly witch woman, sorry, I mean, just woman, could have a word? I think perhaps I could show you how to do that perhaps without breaking his arm…then maybe you could consider not killing me?

Commentary: I’ll admit, I’m not quite sure which is the best approach here. I don’t like to consider myself snivelling, but I not at all am convinced that Claire’s feisty approach would go over too well…at least not long term. I typed into Google “treatment of women in 18th century Scotland”. Let’s just say I didn’t find anything really great.

EXHIBIT C

THE SITUATION: You’re on a horse with hot highlander. You’re freezing. It’s raining.

CLAIRE:

plaid
Claire: Careful. What are you trying to do?

Jamie: I’ll get my plaid loose to cover ye. You’re shivering.

Claire: Thank you. But I’m fine, really.

Jamie: You’re shaking so hard, it’s making my teeth rattle.


AURALEE:

Auralee: Um…what’s going on back there?

Jamie: I’ll get my plaid loose to cover ye. You’re shivering.

Auralee: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Oh God, thank you. So, what do you have on underneath that plaid? (Just kidding. I wouldn’t ask that last part. But I’d totally be thinking it.)

Commentary: Feisty be damned. I hate being cold. I always feel like Jack Nicholson when I’m cold.

So cold

EXHIBIT D

THE SITUATION: You’ve been riding forever now. You’ve almost been killed. It’s cold and freezing. Jamie offers you some alcohol.

CLAIRE:

Jamie: Have a wee nip. It willna fill your belly…

Claire angrily yanks head away.

…but it will make you forget you’re hungry.”

Claire deigns to drink.


AURALEE:

drinking

Commentary: Not necessary…I’m mean, seriously.

Well, there you have it. I’ve presented all the evidence. Who do you think would survive being sent back to 18th Century Scotland? I’m dying to know your thoughts, but until that time, I’ll just tide myself over with more Jamie. Ah, Jamie…

 

ABOUT Auralee

photo (1)Auralee Wallace is an author of humorous commercial women’s fiction and occasional guest blogger at Penny Dreadful Book Reviews https://pennydreadfulbooks.me/. She is a member of the RWA, and her debut novel, Sidekick, a superhero urban fantasy, placed as a finalist in the Virginia Fool for Love Contest, The TARA Contest and The Catherine. Sidekick has been picked up by Harlequin’s Escape Publishing and is due for release June 1st, 2014. Auralee has an undergraduate degree in psychology, a Master’s degree in English literature and has worked in the publishing industry for a number of years before teaching at the college level.

Auralee has always been fascinated by the power of stereotypes in terms of race, gender, and disability and how those beliefs colour our understanding of the world and of each other.

When this semi-natural blonde mother of three children and three rescue cats isn’t writing or playing soccer, she can be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard. She can also be found on Twitter, Goodreads, Facebook, and her blog http://auraleewallace.com.

ABOUT SIDEKICK

SidekickHeroes meets Bridget Jones in this brilliant, hilarious debut novel about a girl who just wants to save the world…

Bremy St James, daughter of billionaire Atticus St James, has been cut off from the family fortune and is struggling to survive in a world that no longer holds its breath every time she buys a new outfit. To make matters worse, her twin sister is keeping secrets, loan sharks are circling, and the man of her dreams — a newspaper reporter — is on assignment to bring down everyone with the last name St James.

Things are certainly looking bleak for the down-and-out socialite until a good deed throws her into the path of the city’s top crime-fighter, Dark Ryder. Suddenly, Bremy has a new goal: apprentice to a superhero, and start her own crime-fighting career.

Ryder has no need for a sidekick, but it turns out the city needs Bremy’s help. Atticus St James is planning the crime of the century, and Bremy may be the only one able to get close enough to her father to stop him.

Now all she needs to do is figure out this superhero thing in less than a month, keep her identity secret from the man who could very well be The One, and save the city from total annihilation.

Well, no one ever said being a superhero would be easy

 BUY LINKS

AMAZON UK | AMAZON CA | AMAZON US | AMAZON AU | B&N | KOBO

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8 thoughts on “If I Were in Claire’s Shoes: An Exploration of Alternative Reactions to Being Sent Back in Time or “Dude, Where’s My Car?””

  1. I’ve always said that if I were in Claire’s shoes I’d probably be crouching in a corner somewhere, rocking back and forth asking, “What the f*%k is going on? Where the hell am I?!” I also probably would have jumped all over Jamie in about 2.5 seconds.

  2. Love the post! I was just talking Andrea’s ear off about how frustrated I am with Claire so I was delighted when she told me about your post…I see we are kindred spirits because you put a voice to my thoughts – thank you!
    I totally think your approach to survival would be more acceptable in my version of the 18th century 🙂

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